in the wee hours of saturday morning, my grandma's heartbeat stopped. her health wasnt in a good condition for quite some time and was recently aggrevated by many factors. no use talking about them now. just hope the person involved will really repent. she had an asthma attack on thursday night. she and my grandfather went to his batik shop as usual that day and she reached home feeling breathless. my relatives called for an ambulance which arrived a freaking 25 minutes later. while waiting for the ambulance, she stopped breathing for 5 to 10 minutes and her heart stopped later. 4 minutes without oxygen to the brain causes irreversible brain damage... the ambulance system is so ridiculous. my relatives called 4 times. they said that the 2 ambulances in the serangoon area were occupied and couldnt come. they called tao payoh which had to check that nobody in tao payoh needed an ambulance before they could send it over. they even wanted to activate the ambulance from paya lebar. hello~ this is an emergency! what kind of system is this? first come first serve?? see if you're lucky enough that nobody is using the ambulance in your area. the medical worker who arrived performed cpr immediately, saying sorry each time he pressed down on my grandma's chest. but he wasnt at fault. they managed to revive her heartbeat and maintain it with drugs, but she was already brain dead. they put her on the life support system so that other relatives could visit her for the last time, finally removing her from it late friday afternoon.
what if the ambulance arrived earlier? what if someone knew cpr and could administer it immediately? would my grandma have lived?
for concerned friends, i'm alright. i must say that i wasnt that close to my grandma but seeing my grandpa really breaks my heart. he was crying non-stop, saying he also doesnt wanna live anymore. life has no more meaning for him... they have been married for almost 60 years, i cant even imagine the anguish he's going through. i hope he can go on with life positively.. i cannot attend the cremation this tuesday cos of my exam. if i am there, i think i'll be crying my eyes out. its too heart-breaking for me to bear.

cherish your loved ones...(v)
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